I was going to write this before I had my operation on the 3rd November 2015. It was going to be about how hard my year had been, about how non-understanding people had been of me. About how tired and bitter I had become, but to be quite honest, I couldn't  face writing all that, I don't think there was any need to either. 

I've waited, hoping my thoughts would organise themselves and inspiration arrive to help me explain how I have felt this year  about my pain & hips. I think now, 7 weeks later , it has. so I'll start writing and see how it goes. 

Before, and between my ops , People see me walking about, driving, working, riding my horse, and think I am ok. What they don’t see is the chronic pain I have suffered for 8 years, in my back and my hips. They don’t see my pain score.  If  I wore it on my head as a  bright flashing light, then for the last 8 years, 70% of the time it would have said between 6 & 8 out of 10.  Which is pretty high. It’s the score where, if you are in hospital and they ask you to score your pain out of 10. 1 being no pain at all, 10 being the worst pain you’ve ever had. If you say 6,7,8, they will give you something like codeine or even morphine. Yet there I was, walking round with a pain score of 6-8, carrying out my life like a “normal person” Yet it wasn’t normal. Nothing about life in chronic pain is normal. I say I had those high scores "only" 70% of the time. That is because in the last two years, since I had my right hip fixed,  I have had some good days, some really good days, 30% of the last 2 years has been good. Which makes for some desperately needed relief from being 100% in the pain scores of 6-8.

Over the last few years, I have worked, I have driven, I have ridden my horse, I have done the garden, I have done the decorating, I have done the house work, the list goes on. I have done the things that normal people do. But it has hurt, every step of the way. My husband said something to me last week. He said that if I hadn’t have found out what was wrong with my hips, I could quite easily be disabled by now, unable to work. 

It really brought home to me that that was the truth. He'd never said it before, perhaps knowing that I thought it myself. But perhaps saying it earlier would have made it a reality. It was the truth, that's really how desperate things were. I can remember about 4 years ago, when I didn’t know all of this hip and back pain was due to my hips. I actually thought that I would end up in a wheel chair by the time I am 40. That is what I was truly coming to terms with in my head. It seemed no one could help me. No spinal doctors, back injections, pain clinics, chiropractors or osteopaths could solve this for me, I was accepting that I was just one of the people that had back pain. I just had to get on with it. I wonder if doctors know what goes on in someone's head when they basically say, "youre with  a high percentage of the adult population that has back pain. Live with it."  Like its normal to be in that much pain and "live with it". 

So I decided I would do all I could between now and the time I could no longer, despite the pain. So I rode my horse, in pain. I lived my life, in pain. Because what was the alternative? Sit around being miserable; mourning for things I thought I could no longer do? I decided I would haul myself through each day, and haul myself into the saddle and ride, for as long as pain would allow me too.  I decided I’d need to do all I could do to help my body through it, and thought I would benefit from some regular massage. So I went to a massage lady at our local gym. It was nice, very relaxing. But I think my tight muscles freaked her out.  She said she thought I could do with sport physio, and that another customer had been to one near Bristol. “Blue” something, she couldn’t remember the name. So I came home and Googled it. And that is how I  found Bluesky sports physio, and a wonderful lady called Donna who said she thought a lot of my  pain was actually due to impingement in my hips.

 And there have we come full circle. The story from that point on is in this blog. And I sit here now, on the 23^rd December 2015 with two hips which have matching 12inch scars from where they have been  opened up, dislocated, reshaped, and stuck back together with metal anchors and 3 screws each.....

....And I have hope at last. I have hope that the years to come will not be full of chronic pain. That my average pain score will not be 6,7,or 8. That I will be able to work, drive, ride my horse, do the garden and just live without the millstone of pain and depression around my neck.

 I even have new plans. I plan to walk up a mountain in aid of a Cerebral Palsy charity that helps my nephew.  My wonderful nephew. He is 12. He has cerebral palsy. He cannot walk, talk or feed himself and yet his smile and personality light up the room when he is there. He is determined through everything he does to make the most of what life has given him. He is my inspiration, and I can only dream of  being as strong and confident as him. I don’t know what the future is for my hips. Maybe I will get better from this recent surgery and never think about them again. Maybe the pain will return in months or years time and I will need hip replacements. Then again, maybe I won’t. But I have made a promise to myself, to make the most of what I have, and do as much as I can, whilst I still can. 

6 week post op physio session.

The day after my 6 week check with the surgeon, I had my next session with my physio, she was pleased to see me fully weight baring and I even did a no-crutch penguin waddle to see what I could do.  At 6 weeks post op with my other hip, if I'd tried to walk without crutches, I would have fallen over!! So I am already ahead of that. She showed me a couple of extra exercises I could do: 1) lieing on my front,bending heel to bum and then lifting the knee off the bed, as a quad stretch. 2) lie on back, knees bent, slide heel up and down away from/towards bum. 3) on back still , slide whole leg outwards

From hip  and back in 4) standing holding back of chair, move leg outwards/sidewards and back 

She then did some work on my lower back as I told her how stiff and painful it was. When she looked/felt my lower back, it was obviously in spasm, no wonder it hurt so much! So she did my usual back treatment:acupuncture, mobilising of the vertebrae and facet joints and then massage. She said we need to make sure we look after my back throughout this rehab and try to ensure it does not go into full spasm. But she is still convinced my back will get , get the long term now my hips are fixed. 

6 weeks post (2nd) Op

16th December 2015 

The last week of the 6 week post op period of minimal weight baring and other restrictions has been the hardest. I felt pretty bouncy and positive up till then but all of a sudden, my right leg started to play up and I was finding it hard to get around, as my right leg would just feel so tired that I had to sit down before I fell down! I was also pretty tired and achey all over. Sleep wasnt great. I'd found that I could lie on my non-op side with a pillow between my legs to support the op leg. But I think that just aggravated my right hip in the screw area and made it bit sore and swollen. I could also sleep on my front but whilst this was comfortable for my hips, it was no good for my back as it just made my lower back achey and tense. So I was finding that what ever position I went to sleep in, I'd wake 2 or 3 hrs later from the pain of either pressure on my right hip or tenseness in my lower back. I tried sleeping on my back again but would usually end up not getting off to sleep until 2/3am. 

Despite the overall achiness, especially in my right leg, my left leg continued to be surprisingly good. Not much pain from it, and  not the constant gnawing groin pain I had from my right leg at this same point. 

Tuesday 15th December saw me down in Truro for my post op check. I had an X-ray taken and then saw my surgeon. He has really pleased, he said he could hardly see the fracture line in my trochanter and that I had healed really well. He said I could start putting my full weight through it from that moment, carry on using 2 crutches for two weeks, then down to one crutch until I could walk without wobbling from side to side.   All restrictions were lifted, I could do whatever ever I wanted, even horse riding, yoga and swimming from 8 weeks, but to listen to my body and stop if it hurts. 

In reality this means that from eight weeks, horse riding will be just see if I can get on amd walk round. Swimming will by strengthening exercises in a hydrotherapy pool . I don't think I'll be going to yoga class until I have got rid of the last crutch. But I can do some of the gentle poses at home

  

I asked him about my right hip, mentioning that it had been a bit grumpy the last week or so with some swelling at the bottom of the scar. He thought it would benefit from having the screws taken out but that he could do it the same time as taking screws out of left hip next year. Then he looked a bit closer at the X-ray and said he could see some inflammation/bone spur but that had grown in that hip since surgery  but that it wasn't causing impingement. 

We decided I'd come and see him in April for another X-ray/review. 

I started weight baring as soon as I left his room and it felt OK, my right leg deffinatly appreciated having the pressure taken off. 

My left hip on 15th December, 6 weeks post op. The screws look to be a different angle to my right hip. I wonder if this will mean I won't ongoing discomfort  from them like I do from the right?

My right hip at 2 years 2weeks post op. I have circled the area of inflammation/bone spur that my surgeon pointed out, this has grown since March 2014. The technical term for it is Heterogenic Ossification. I googled it last night and freaked my self out, it seems in the USA, many people that have hip surgery are put on long term anti inflammatories or have one-dose of radiation to prevent HO developing. We don't get that in the UK.  HO can cause impingement depending on location, can irritate surround tissues causing pain and can even break off and lodge somewhere causing pain. So I have decided to try and forget about it as all the scenarios could equally not happen. The X-ray in April will show of it has changed,nor if HO has formed in my left hip. Fingers crossed it won't. 

Four Weeks Post OP

1st December 2015

Today  I am four weeks postop for surgery on my left hip, which coincides with bieng two years post up for the same surgery on my right hip. The  Difference I feel between the two surgeries is quite remarkable. I am not sure if it is because my right leg is now a strong leg to stand on or because I haven't had my IT band released or because I have just had less of the labrum removed or perhaps it's a combination of all these things as well as knowing I'm finally over it.....I've done my two surgeries. Fingers crossed I will require no more and can get on with life. 

I had staples this time, 30 altogether these came out at 14 days postop and all was well with the wound.  It doesn't look as pretty as the other side did, which was sealed with glue, but apparently the staple marks will fade so I will just have matching hip scars. My husband thinks I should be proud of them. 

Pain relief wise, I have had a number of days where I have taken no pain relief at all, and if I have, it has been paracetomol with occasional codiene

The swelling has reduced greatly and is really just limited to the trochanter area. I've had little to no groin pain. My right hip had been really strong for the last three weeks I've been so pleased with how it  had been holding me up, going around on crutches and only bearing 10% weight in my left leg is extremely tiring but I think it's tired now, and  I feel really quite tired achy all over. So I'm  taking a couple of sofa & codiene days.  just another two weeks to get through before seeing my surgeon for a post op check and an x-ray. Hopefully that will show that all is well and that the bone has knitted together where the screws are holding it. The protocol last time was another two weeks after that of using two crutches and fully weight-bearing on the left leg and then from eight weeks, I should be able to do what I want as long as my body allows me, whilst gradually weaning off the crutches,
 I know I can't do any yoga until 12 weeks which is disappointing but at least I start riding my horse a bit if I can, from 8 weeks, five minutes at a time so I can build up. I hope to be able to drive from 7 weeks, especially as I have a few jobs to do over Christmas ( I run a pet care company and have a few cat feeding jobs booked in for some loyal customers) I'm hoping to get back to work properly in January, although I do have someone covering dog walking customers until February. 

I think the hard work really starts when the initial six weeks is over. This six weeks is incredibly boring and I've not really got that much to say about it other than its just a daily treadmill getting up, doing my exercises, lying on the sofa, sitting in the chair,  watching TV, doing a jigsaw, playing scrabble! only getting up to go to the toilet or to the kitchen to get lunch or cups of tea in my flask which I then carry in my backpack back to the sofa. I've been out to the physio once, she was really pleased with how I'm doing she could see how much stronger I look than last time. That was at the 3 week post op point, and was just a check up really. To check my scar and how we are doing with the passive exercises. 


 I've been to see my horses once and that's it really, I'm trying to make the most of having a good rest trying not to do too much, and gather my energy for the real rehab soon to come. 

My wound at about 18 days post op. 

At 4 weeks post op, I'm quite pleased with it.

Seeing my horse, Charlie Brown at 3 weeks 

My day nurse, Pie

My day nurse, Pie

One Week Post Op

10thNovember 2015

Today I am one week post op and have been home since Saturday evening, so I managed to only stay in hospital 4 nights this time.

Before you read this, I'd like to say that I did not have the usual post op experience in hospital due to a complication with my blood. So if you are reading this in a pre-op situation, please do not be to freaked out by my description, the actual pain in my hip and my progress was only hindered by that separate condition. The post op pain was not bad at all, when I was able to keep pain killers down!

Trying to remember the order in which things happened over those 4 days is a bit hard. I think it went as follows: I had my wound drain taken out on the Tuesday morning. The  morphine pump & fluids got taken off on the Wednesday afternoon. With the removal of the morphine pump, also came the removal of the ECG and blood pressure machines. It was good to get rid of all that.

I started on the oral morphine (oramoroph) instead, along with paracetmol & codeine but I began to feel quite nauseous again. On Wednesday afternoon, the physios came to get me to just stand up and maybe take a step, using the walking frame. But as soon I sat up, my head started thumping and I passed out so it was back into the bed and they didn't try and get me up again the rest of that day.

On the Thursday morning my urinary catheter was removed. After I had my lunch, the physios came to get me up again but I had such a terrible head ache, as soon as I was upright my head started to bang and I felt dizzy. Then I was sick, mostly on the physiotherapist! I can't remember  much of Thursday afternoon, I think I was sick a fair few times. I tried to keep my eyes closed for the most of that day as my head was banging so hard, they hurt to look through .I can remember them getting me out of my Pj's and into a hospital gown so that it could be replaced easier when I was sick on it. I was also in a fair amount of pain from my op hip, as they had taken it out of the CPM machine and it felt like the joint was just becoming stiffer and more painful without the constant gentle movement. They gave me oramorph for the pain but I vomited it straight back up, along with the paracetmol & codeine. So then I had no pain relief on board. I felt a bit stuck in a cycle of pain and sickness that felt like it lasted hours and hours but I am sure it was only 3 or 4 at the most. The sick bowls in that hospital are ridiculously small, I needed a stack of six to get through one after the other, I can remember thinking how absurd it was that something so horrid as being sick was made into a real challenge of aiming into the silly little bowls. Anyway, that's TMI, sorry about that. They finally got my sickness under control with a anti-sickness injection given in my thigh. Then the CPM went back on and I was able to keep some pain relief down. 

During the day, I had had a blood sample taken and it confirmed my haemoglobin had dropped like last time. I have a blood disorder called Beta Thalassemia Trait which is supposed to be fairly non symptomatic however it is becoming evident for me that my blood struggles to keep my haemoglobin levels up. Normal haemoglobin levels for women are115 to 165 grams per litre of blood. My normal levels appear to be 110, 115 at best. It dropped to 107 in summer 2015 (when I was feeling extreme fatigue) and was 74 after my other hip op. They were now at  80. So it was decided I should have a small blood transfusion. My heart rate was also pretty high, and my blood oxygen levels were pretty low.  That was organised and after a round of "hunt the vein"  (I have the most ridiculously deep veins) , I had more  blood taken and a new cannula/Ven flon placed in the back of my hand and the donated blood was given to me. I had to be hooked back up to the ecg and blood pressure machine and have regular observations done again whilst the transfusion was going on - so no rest.  

Friday morning I was able to get out of bed and use the bathroom on my own, with the walking frame.  My headache had gone but I still felt a bit nauseas so started some anti sickness tablets. My pain wasn't too bad and I managing on paracetmol and codeine. It is amazing how just a pint of donated blood can change the way you feel. The nurses said that they could tell how much better I was just by looking at me. My blood pressure was normal and my heart rate had dropped.

So, mid morning on Saturday, I was able to get out of bed, walk to my room door on the crutches and a few steps down the corridor. The physio took me in a wheel chair down to their exercise room where there is a set of steps, and I managed to go up one side and down the other. So that meant I could home. 

It was 6pm by the time we got home to Weston super mare. It wasn't the best journey I've ever had, pretty painful. So I was glad to get back in my own bed and my cat soon appeared, and she  slept on my chest all night . 

The next 3 days I was surprised how much better I felt compared to when I had my right leg done. I think the combination of relief that it was over and both hips were now fixed-hips, combined with not needing to take a stack of codeine and diazepam that I had last time meant I was more "with it". My Mom and my husband seemed particular impressed with how much better I seemed.

My op leg felt extremely heavy and difficult to manoeuvre , I could hardly pick it up of the floor enough to walk forwards with it. The next 5 weeks were set to be rather dull and boring. The protocol for the pre-op period for the this open debridement surgery is given below.

And here is the link from my first 5 weeks when I had my right leg done in 2013, since I am sure I will only be writing out the same description of my day to day life!:

http://blueskyhips.blogspot.co.uk/2014/02/weeks-2-to-5-post-op.html

1) Toe Touch Weight Baring only on op leg

2) Hip movements allowed.
Hip flex passively to 70 deg.
Hip abduction to 30 deg
Hip extension to neutral (ie. Lying supine or prone)

3) Hip movements to be avoided
Hip Adduction beyond neutral so no crossing ankles
Any active hip flexion or abduction.
Avoid powering up hip abductors.

My husband did the following passive exercises for me twice day.

1) Passive adduction, not more that 30degrees - 10 times

2) passive flexion, not more that 70 degrss - 10 times

These two exercises are important to maintain motion between the hip capsule and labrum (well, what bit I have left!) and to avoid adhesions forming 

I did the following exercise 3 times a day:

1) static quad sets x 10

2) static glute sets x 10

3) ankle pumps

4) ankle rotations

5) Some Pilates exercises for my other leg, like single leg raise, flexion , adduction

My wound at one week post op. 

Op Day

8th November 2015

Today I am one week post op and have been home since Saturday evening, so I managed to only stay in hospital 4 nights this time. 

My admission time on the 3rd was 12:20, so we had a morning to waste. We stayed at a nice hotel near the hospital the night of the 2nd, I wasn't allowed any food from 7:30 am and clear fluids only until 11:30 am. So I got croissants and nice jam to eat in our room at 7am. We hung around the hotel room until 10am, relaxing. I had a long, hot shower, probably the last for the next month at least. I did some yoga whilst my husband went for his breakfast. The last yoga involving my left leg for 3 months. 

My left hip was really sore that day of the op, I was limping on it and could not have any pain killers due to the  amount of drugs I'd be having in a few hours time. We got to the hospital an hour early as we had nothing else to do. My room was ready so we able to go on in and watch tv until things started rolling. I felt really emotional when we first got to the room and had a good 5 minute cry and hug. I think they were a mixture of tears of pain, relief that I made it to this point at last and trepidation at what I was about to do electively. Anyway, a good cry always does me good and I felt better for it, determined to get on get this over with. 

The anaesthetist and surgeon came to see me and I signed the papers and had an arrow drawn on my left leg. I got changed into my hospital gown and got into bed where I would be warmer and comfier with my painful hip. 

They came to get me at 14:45. I was wheeled down to theatre on the bed which was nice. I then had to get out and hop up on the prep table and lie on my back. They anaesthetist and the technicians were all very nice and it wasn't long until I we talking about horses and cats.. I had a cannula placed in the back of my right hand and an oxygen mask. I was given the first lot of meds and I remember feeling floaty and warm. Then I dont remember anything until I woke up, which I was glad about as I really didn't want to feel the epidural going into my spine. 

When I woke up, I was in the recovery room, back in my bed. I felt really Hot and then I felt a bit painful, about a 7 out of 10. I had a load of bubble wrap on me under the blankets and something blowing warm air underneath it, they said I had been cold in theatre. So I got it all that taken off and given some morphine and then I felt pretty comfy. I couldn't feel anything below my waist due to epidural. The nurse kept checking if I could feel her touching my foot or leg. The feeling in my right leg came back before my left leg, which stayed quite numb until after I got back to my room.  I had to stay in the recovery a while because we had to wait to for the "blood cleaning machine" to Finnish its stuff. Because I have a blood disorder called Beta Thalassemia trait, my heamoglobin doesn't need much excuse to drop. So they had collected the blood I lost during surgery and it went into the machine to be cleaned and then into a drip bag. This blood of my own was then given back to me through my cannula. Whilst we were waiting  for this, the nurse showed me how to use the morphine pump they had set up for me, I had a button that I could press to release some of the morphine into the drip line. It would then not allow any more to be released for 5mins.

I got taken back to my room at about 7pm, and my leg was put into the continual passive motion machine (CPM). This constantly, slowly, flexes the leg backwards and forwards, the idea Bieng that the movement prevents adehesions forming in the hip joint. I also had  the flotron cuffs placed on my lower legs, these inflate alternately to compress the leg and help prevent thrombosis. I Had had a urinary catheter placed whilst I was under anaesthetic so at least I didn't need to worry about going to the loo!

I was hooked up to blood pressure machine, Oxygen saturation finger monitor, ECG, the oxygen nasal prongs, and fluid drip with morphine pump attached. That's a whole lot of stuff inflating, going up and down  and beeping.  I felt pretty uncomfortable with it all going on, so kept on pressing my morphine button. I was allowed a cup of tea at 10pm but unfortunately I vomitted it straight back up. And so began the long night I had been dreading. The nurse kept coming in every hour to do my observations. The machines kept on beeping and things kept inflated and deflating. At 1am my morphine pump ran out. It took over an hour for the nurses to get round to getting it changed and the machine kept on beeping to say it was empty. I felt so hot and tired and uncomfortable. I had the blind up a bit with the window open slightly. I can remember looking out at the darkness and thinking it was never going to get light. But it did at last. 

I managed a glimpse of what my leg now looked like. No going back now!! 

Moving towards getting the left hip fixed...

10th Novmber 2015 

A little time has passed since I posted about getting the ball rolling for getting my left hip sorted out. I am now sitting here one week post op for that hip! Things moved quickly from when I went to see my GP to ask for the referral. My health insurance have thankfully decided to cover this hip as it wasn't really mentioned on my medical records. So things moved swiftly and a lot less stressfully then for right hip.

I went to see my consultant on the 27th September. He said that my hip was obviously deteriorating and it made sense to get it sorted now. As the open debridement surgery had been such a success for right hip, and the X-ray of the left looked similar to the right pre-op, we decided the best route was to have the open surgery on this side also. 

The X-ray shows a small CAM deformity on the femoral head and a large pincer or overhang of the acetabula rim. When comparing it to the the right, it's easy to see the difference and what needs to be done! 

I had had my open surgery on the right hip in December 2013. The pain I had in the run up to that was virtually unbearable, as I had a lot of pain in both hips. I had had to place my larger horse in full livery as I physically could not look after him anymore. Obviously that was not cheap and I was worried about what the future might be for me and him. I have owned him since he was 6 months old and he is now 14 years. I was also worried about work. I run a pet care franchise and whilst the actual work of looking after other people's animals is not to taxing, the driving, walking and even desk admin work was getting to be very painful.  By the time I had hauled my body up to December 2013 I was exhausted and frankly rather desperate for something to get me out of the cycle of chronic pain I was in. 

I found the rehab from that surgery tough, mentally and physically. To go from being able to do the things you need to do, even though you are in pain,to not even  Being able to get out of bed on your own for the first few days is a bit of a shock. 

You can read about the rehab for my right hip here onwards. :

http://blueskyhips.blogspot.co.uk/2014/02/op-day-and-day-1-post-op.html

From about 5 months post op I could tell I had done the right thing. I progressed on to doing Pilates, riding my horse and even some gentle skiing in January 2014. I could feel a real difference between left and right hip when I sat on my horse. My right leg hung different in the saddle, it felt much freer and more comfortable against my horses side. My left leg just felt a stuck and useless, sometimes I would get a really sharp pain in the front which I guess was the impingement of the acetabulum & femoral neck. It held me back a lot and I didn't do much riding. I'd hack out with the girls from our yard once or twice a week. I found walk and trot ok, so long as my horse behaved but cantering and galloping were not possible. The last time I galloped my horse was November 2014, it really hurt me, I could feel impingement with every stride . 

In May 2015 my Pilates class got cancelled. I started Yoga, the wife of one of my husband friends had just qualified as a yoga teacher, so I had a private lesson from her and then joined her group lesson on a Thursday evening. 

I really enjoyed the yoga, I found it more relaxing than Pilates. Whilst there was plenty I could not do on my left hip (positions that involved a lot of flexing/lunging or twisting of that hip) the rest of my body really appreciated it so I stuck at it until the week before surgery on my left. If you have never done a yoga sun salutation, I can highly recommend it for stretching and easing your whole body out. I tried my best to start each day with 3 sun salutations.

The summer of 2015 was a long one, and also pretty painful. I did have some good days, when I tried to make the most of it and get things done. My lower back went to complete spasm on two occasions. I had a lot of pain in my left sacroiliac joint, which seemed to shoot through from my left groin. I also had a lot of  illiotibial band pain. Work was very very busy, and working hard whilst in a lot of pain in tiring mentally as well as physically. I run a pet care franchise and whilst looking after other people pets isn't too taxing, I was doing a lot of driving, walking and desk admin work. I did not have a single full day off mid June through to September. I felt like I was hauling my body through each day/week, and could get little enjoyment from things. My hobbies of riding my horse and gardening seemed crammed in around work when what I really needed was a sit down.  I didn't ride my horse much at all, and if I did, it hurt. 

Anyway, I managed to drag my self up to September and our 10 day holiday, without breaking myself completly. We spent our holiday travelling from south to north wales and back with our dog, Ruby, in our camper van. My aim for the holiday was to do a little as possible. I achieved it, but I would much rather of been going for long walks on the beach, walking up Snowdon & Cader-Idris or even going pony treking. Instead I had to settle for a steam train journey that passed the bottom of Mount Snowdon. I took a picture and we planned what route we will take to get to the top next year when I have two good hips. 

As soon as I got back I set the ball rolling for getting surgery on the left hip. Things went smoothly and the date was hooked. 3rd November 2015. I got back on life's treadmill and went back to hauling my body through each day and week, I stopped horse riding as it was just to painful. I was ready to get off the treadmill. 

One Year 10 Months Post Right Hip Open SDD Surgery for FAI

Cant believe how long it has been since my last post....I can remember in my last but one post planning to just try and get on with life and forget about this hip stuff, until I was able to contemplate doing any more about them. Bear with me on this update, it might be a long one.....

I am still super pleased with the surgery on my right hip, it was absolutely the right thing to do. Since I last posted in January 2015, I have developed an issue with the 3 screws that were placed through the head of the trochanter. These screws are only there because of the type of surgery I had, in order to get to the joint they needed to dislocate the hip and to do that, they have to take off the head of the trochanter, and screw it back on. Once the bone had healed, the screws serve no purpose and it seems many people go on with their life never having an issue with them.

But for some people, the screws can become a problem. They can irritate the muscles and tissues  surrounding them, causing pain and swelling. I had thought that my screws had settled down, having been pretty bit sore through the early recovery phase, by 9 months post op, I had stopped thinking about them. But from about Feb 2015, they started to play up. It has been intermittent, mainly brought on by  “too much” walking but also is worse in the cold/damp weather. The feeling is a bit like something sticking in my leg but from the inside out, and also a bit itchy. Sometimes I get pain radiating down my IT band and very occasionally, a bit of groin pain. It is also uncomfortable to lie directly on, and a  press or knock to the area results in pain and the itching feeling. I also have a small swelling at the base of my scar, it often feels like I am sitting on an egg under my outer thigh.

I have tried not to be to disappointed by the problems the screws are causing as I know it should be resolved by having the screws taken out. But as I have just not had the time to be able to take a week off to have the screws out, I have found the pain from them rather frustrating as it is the only thing that makes me think about that hip.

Despite the screw pain. I have spent much of the year, so far, enjoying be able to ride o my horse, which given that my 1^st opinion hip consultant said was an “unreasonable expectation”, I shall forever be thankful to my 2^nd opinion consultant who fixed that hip. I have been limited by my left hip (more on that later) so made the decision to just take things easy this year, no travelling my horse to lessons, clinics or shows. Very little in the way of schooling (since my left leg prevents me from doing lateral work) Instead,  we have been “happy hackers”, riding out 2 or 3 times a week from the yard.

Back wise, I have only been to see my physio (Donna) for two episodes this year,  that said they were both quite horrible back pain episodes. The first was in March, when my upper back went into spasm. It was sudden and disabling pain, which felt like a bolt of lightning in my spine, and was unable to move very far for a good  few minutes.

During the treatments for this, Donna mentioned how rounded my upper back appears, and how I need to try and address my posture to decrease the amount of upper back pain I have, and stop me developing a “dowagers hump” in years to come (Google that and you will do anything to avoid it!) She suggested looking in the Alexander Technique (AT). So I started researching AT. It all seemed a bit “vague” to me, the Wikipedia definition of AT is here:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alexander_technique

Having a science/veterinary nurse background, I like facts, and struggle to understand phrases like “Sensory Appreciation” or “let your head and neck be free” and the Youtube videos  I watched seemed very odd, the AT teacher just making minute adjustments to a person as they sat, stood, lay down. But I have always trusted Donna, and if she thought AT could help me, then I would try it. I found a fantastic teacher in Bristol called Lisa Clarke. I went to my fist lesson, and can honestly say I didn’t really understand what on earth she was on about, but it intrigued me. So I kept going every week, from April to the end of June. One of the first things I learnt about AT is that it cannot be learnt from a book or a video, you have to have a lesson to understand it. And so I won’t go into great detail here, suffice to say I found the whole thing immensely helpful, and my posture has improved no end. Just making some minor adjustments in the way I use my back, neck and head I have improved my back pain no end, and If my upper back does feel pinchy, I know it is because I have been neglecting my AT techniques. Here’s a few link about AT:

http://cliftonalexandertechnique.co.uk/
http://www.alexandertechnique.com/
http://www.stat.org.uk/

So from April through to July I felt pretty good, both back and hip wise, the pain from the screws wasn’t to bad with the warmer weather and my left hip was behaving pretty well. I also started Yoga in May. One of my husband’s friend’s wife was a newly qualified teacher and I have always got on well with her when we have met so I decided to give it a go. I think she was a bit worried she might be getting me doing something that would hurt me, when I listed out all my issues, but she was brave enough to take me on and I had a couple of private lessons before joining in the group class on a Thursday. I have found it very beneficial and slightly less intense than pilates,  of course there are a number of poses that I cannot, and some that I should not do, but I know how to listen to my body and not push it to do things that will be detrimental.

July and August are traditionally my most busy months work wise. I run a pet care business and so the summer means long days driving around the many cat care at home visits that come hand in hand with the school holidays, and people going away. I also had some donkeys to care for two weeks. All that aswell as my usual dog walks and looking after my own animals. Something had to give and in the end, it was my lower back and left hip. I struggled through those two months, and had to stop riding my horse because of my left hip. I was having a lot of groin pain, ITB pain and SI joint point. My lower back spasmed a couple  of times, and I managed to control it myself with medication and stretches. Then, in August, it all went very wrong. I was in tonnes of pain, left and right hip and all across my lower back. I sent to see Donna a few times and she said the issues  on the left side were to do with my Psoas and piriformis muscles, and that the issue on my right was my lumber disc disease rearing its head and putting all the muscles on that side into spasm. The last time I saw Donna was the 17^th August and she did some manipulations that she hadn’t done to me before, along with some acupuncture and massage. It was really full on and very painful but oh my word, how wonderful I felt 2 days after. She is an amazing physio!! We were due to go on holiday to Wales the 1^st September so I decided it was best to not attempt riding my horse until we got back from that, to give my back and hips time to settle back down to “normal” 

My plan for my left hip has always been to get it fixed over a winter, as I tend be quieter work wise and as a real outdoorsy person, if I have sit around recovering during any months, I would rather it be the winter ones. I couldn’t have contemplated it last winter, I was pleased with my other hip allowing me to get back to horse riding- and skiing! But through the middle of 2015, I can feel that my left hip is starting to deteriorate, I am getting more in the way of stabbing groin pain,  SI joint pain, and part of me longs to know how much more stable my lower back will feel with a matching pair of correct hips. Plus, I am through with taking it easy. I want to gallop my horse on the beach , school him, go to clinics with him, take him on holiday to see, and ride with my friend in Wales. I want to go kayaking. I want to go on proper walks, the sort of walks where you need to wear proper hiking gear, where you have to pack you rucksack with an OS map, food, a flask of tea, waterproofs, a torch and a fist aid kit. I want to walk the Cornish Coastal Path, the Mendip Hills and Snowdon. The only I see me doing those things is if I can get this gammy old left hip fixed and get properly fit again.  So, when we got back from our holiday, I set the wheels in motion to get my left hip looked at. I have an appointment to see my surgeon in Truro on the 25^th September.

Snowdon

Crushing the "you can't do that" voice

16th Jan 2015 I have been pushing my luck all week. And now I am paying for it but in a positive way. I am Sat here snuggled on a sofa with my non op hip (old lefty) resting on a cushion, in the TV room at Hotel Alpe in St Martin De Belleville, 3 valleys, France.,at the end of a skiing holiday. This time last year, my Facebook status read "feeling like I do have two legs after all" I was just starting to weight bear on my right leg and reduce down to one crutch. Yesterday, I ski'd 10 miles from a height of 2400m. It was a challenge, I am only just out of snow plough and into parallel skiing, I still have that fearsome moment when the next section looks so steep the skiers in front look like ants, but I pushed on. There is something awesome about beating that little voice that says "you can't do that, who do you think are for even  attempting this , don't be silly, you need to stop now "that voice has been winning over for a while now and yesterday  I suppressed that voice and I did it, feeding the part of me that is actually pretty much a determined dare devil. The part of me that longs to gallop full pelt along the beach on my horse again, the part of me that wants to climb snowdon mountain again. The part of me that secretly longs to do a parachute jump. The part of me limited in recent years by hip & back pain. As I wooshed down a particularly straight section, reaching that point that your face stings with the cold wind, that point where you are only just in control, I felt like the old me. That I was crushing that voice who try's to convince me I can't. Well actually I can. 

But now, That's me done skiing for this year my un operated hip (old lefty) has woken up in a very bad mood. On the positive side, I now know the surgery on my right hip was worth it, as it feels great! Onwards and upwards, I am so so very grateful for what I have been able to do and mountain tops I have seen this week....hopefully by this time next year I'll be well on my way to a matching pain free pair.

Now I do appreciate that I am very lucky to be able to ski post a Fai repair/with fai. I know that there are many in my situation for whom skiing (or what ever their chosen longing may be) will never be reality. We each have ownbattles to fight and we should strive to do the best we can, even if that is just putting one foot in front of the other, and we should not expect the journey to be easy.

There is a quote told to me that I try to use in all asspects  of my life. I was involved in the retraining of my horse whose behavioural issues had spiralled out of control and I was seriously facing retiring  him if retraining did not help. I was reading Buck Brannamans book Believe . In it he mentions St Francis of Assisi's words :

"Start by doing what's necessary; then do what's possible; and suddenly you are doing the impossible."
With my horse, we started with the necessary being leading in hand training on the ground to help him be a safe horse to be around. Then it became possible to ride him safely for short periods, 9 months later we were riding out alone up Cadbury Camp hill. Something we  thought impossible. 
So it was with my hip recovery. The necessary being the physiotherapy and hydrotherapy to allow me to put one foot in front of the other. And then came the possible of crossing the road on two crutches to sit on a bench to going back to  work and before long doing  what once seemed like impossible, riding my horse and now skiing. 
Taking my skis back to the hire shop this afternoon, walking across the bottom of the ski slope with skiers whizzing down and stopping at the end, grinning, I had to pinch myself that I had done it myself, yes my hip is shouting at me now but I had done it. And don't care if I never manage to do it again. Take it a step at a time. stay on each step as long as you need, above all, be kind to yourself. 

 

 

 

Top of the world, 15th Jan 2015